Tuesday, December 1, 2009

An Annoying Expense

No, I'm not talking about car repairs or Swiffer refills. I'm talking about having to replace my "fat" (not phat) jeans. My one and only pair of jeans that fit me, has given up its ghost. I now need to replace it.

About a couple of years ago, I was invited to an old college friend's wedding. He happens to be a childhood buddy of my ex, so I knew the ex would be at the wedding. I dreaded seeing my ex, not because we had a horrible break-up, but because I had gained 25 lbs since our break-up.

Now mind you, I'm not fat. I'm relatively slender, compared to the average American woman. I was also extremely skinny while I was dating my ex during college (approx. 95 lbs).

Although I didn't have any residual feelings for my ex, my vanity couldn't allow him to see me 25 lbs heavier. I started exercising regularly and went on a strict diet. I managed to bring my weight down by 15 lbs. I was pretty happy being 105 lbs and I thought I looked pretty good! I was pretty certain that I could maintain this weight and got rid of a lot of my "fat" clothes.

As they say, the best laid plans of mice and men. Now that the wedding has come and gone, I lost motivation to keep exercising. (See the "exercise jar" on the right sidebar?) I've also started "emotional eating". And guess what? I'm back to my pre-wedding weight. **Sigh**

I guess I could try to squeeze myself into my "skinny" jeans. But I'm afraid of creating an unsightly muffin top. Or worse yet, a cracked muffin top.

I guess I have 2 options: (1) buy a replacement "fat" jeans, or, (2) lose weight.

I'm just not sure which route to take...


Abigail said...

Especially with an issue like emotional eating, you probably want to compromise.

Buy 2 pairs of pants that fit. Or however many that you can keep going, but not so many that you get comfortable and put off working out/eating better.

The thing about emotional eating is that it's the hardest to quit. I know all too well, I'm afraid. It's not something you can turn off right away. It's more something that you need to work on, thinking, "Why do I want to eat? What else could I do to comfort myself?" and sometimes you'll fail and it sucks.

I find a lot of my eating happens when I'm not doing anything else with my hands. So I keep my hands busy, doing comments on other blogs or playing a game online or whatever. For awhile, I took up knitting/crocheting as a way to keep my hands busy and be productive. Heck, if you have to, play solitaire.

The hardest thing for me is to read without eating. Nasty habit I picked up and have trouble shaking.

I would also recommend getting some gum. When I'm stressed, I tend to get what I call a "chewing" hunger. I want thick pretzels or something to really work through. I've heard it's somewhat common. But I have loads of gum now, which I'm hoping will supplant that urge.

Anyway, my point is that yeah, not buying new jeans could keep you motivated to lose weight. But it could also send you into a shame spiral (if you have a setback or whatever) that causes MORE eating. Then you really won't fit into your jeans and may eat even more. Not good.

Miss M said...

While cleaning the closet the other day I found a pair of jeans I hadn't seen in years, a really nice pair I bought at my skinniest. It's unlikely I'll ever fit in them again, yet I hang on to them in the hopes that one day I will. I did let go of a lot of other skinny clothes :( Lately whenever I find myself outgrowing my wardrobe I get the motivation to diet, I have no desire to buy a whole new closet full of clothes. Definitely cheaper to just lose the excess weight, but it's not easier. I want to lose weight before the wedding but thus far I've done nothing to get me there. I haven't been to the gym in months! Want to go on a diet together?

WellHeeled said...

You look gorgeous! I love that red dress. I think somewhere in the middle might be good.. maybe you can challenge yourself to lose 5-10 pounds, then buy a pair of looser jeans?

Also, I've found that keeping fruit around me helps a lot. When I mindlessly eat, at least I'm mindlessly eating oranges or grapes.

BackOfficeMonkey said...

Best smile ever.

paranoidasteroid said...

Holy cow, lady, you're gorgeous!

I agree with WellHeeled. Give it a few weeks and then buy for wherever you are.

Sunflowers said...

My ex wants to get together later this month... I haven't seen him in 5-6 yrs, and I've gained about 25 lbs since I last saw him (130 --> 155. But I'm 5'7... so not fat, but definitely fluffier :p). So I can totally relate to that story... except I wish I had known we were going to get together 6 mos ago, so I could also have had some extra motivation to shed the weight. <.<

ANYWAY. I would buy jeans that are comfortable. You can always get them altered if you lose weight, right?

And you look great in the pic, btw! I'm sure you look great now too ;)

Em said...

I always yo-yo with my own weight but as long as I keep in mind that I need to be healthy by maintaining my weight right now, I won't stress myself as much. :)